Bigfoot and the Catacombs

Posted December 3, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: anthropomorphic, controversial, cryptozoology, speculation, television, unexplained

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The S1/Ep6 episode of Terror in the Woods featured an encounter with a cryptid and later a ghost, haunting, or restless spirit encounter.  First considered were the adventures of Rodney and fellow campers who were settled in at a campsite in Red River Gorge, Kentucky when a large rock landed near them, followed by others.  Guttural vocalizations then came towards night as well as tree-knockings, sounds reportedly generated by Bigfoot creatures hitting limbs against trees.  The campers heard bipedal footfalls, and Rodney saw the outline of a large creature, which shunned flashlight beams and began throwing tree limbs.  Later into night, camping pans were knocked over, rummaging sounds were heard, and Rodney despite having only a machete exited his tent to see a Bigfoot creature scraping a pan, presumably scavenging food.  The creature stood six to seven feet tall, and had broad shoulders and long arms.  This Bigfoot made long, angry vocalizations as it made off.  The other campers with Rodney were professionals who did’t want to speak of the incident.  Rodney, however, continued to wander the woods in later times with a camera and firearm in search of the creature.

The “Catacombs” segment took place in Savannah, Georgia.  Ashley and Jess with others climbed down into the catacombs which were located near an abandoned hospital that was used as a quarantine location for yellow fever patients in the late 19th century.  Some of the unfortunate patients had tried in the 1800’s to escape the grounds via the catacombs while others were simply contained there.  Anyways, the group held a seance in a large chamber of the catacombs and heard a large stone shatter on the wall.   The last person in the group to depart the catacombs is reported to have felt a suctioning force on her body which pulled her back into the underground chamber.  A second effort to climb up and out was successful, however.  It was related that guards were stationed in the catacombs in the past to prevent patients from escaping them, with the inference being that they had encountered one of these spirits, still trying to perform their duty…  

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“The Hell Hound” on “Terror in the Woods”

Posted November 30, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: controversial, horror, mysteries, paranormal, speculation, television

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The Hell Hound episode of “Terror in the Woods” (S1/Ep9) wasn’t the kind of hell hound that I had been expecting.  In fact, at first I was wondering if the episode bore the wrong label, or if the hell hound would show up in a second segment.  To me, what was presented was more of a shadow person, restless spirit, haunting, or possession-type case, none of which represent my usual territory…

…at any rate, the dark, full hour-long story concerned a woman called Amy who in May of 2016 went on a ghost-hunting expedition with a number of others to an abandoned prison (also described as a hospital) situated outside of Columbus, Ohio. where over 300 died in a large fire in 1930.  She described a feeling of eyes upon her as she entered the building, and felt uncomfortable.  Although a person fascinated by the paranormal, Amy’s feelings turned from excitement to fear.  In one cell, she reported encountering a featureless, dark shadow of which she snapped a picture that later did reveal an image.  Amy fled the hospital and returned to the isolated cottage in the woods where she resided with her husband and a dog, Jake.

The week after the incident, Amy’s husband, normally a skeptic on paranormal matters, heard a raspy voice in his ear telling him to kill himself.  The family dog whined and sat at the bedroom doorway, refusing to cross the threshold.  Unnerving events continued for months thereafter, and Amy dreamed of seeing a featureless dark shape in the corner of the bedroom that slowly moved towards her.  The day after, she found bruises on the top part of her legs that looked like finger marks.  Due to recurrent vivid nightmares, Amy became afraid of going to sleep.  The dog “Jake” would apparently perceive the entity, which the woman described as being a “hell hound.”  Research performed by the woman suggested that seeing such a creature meant that you were about to die.  Others reportedly had also seen black dogs in the prison visited.

One day Amy found her dog lying outside, unable to move.  She apparently had a nasty dream prior to this of finding the dog eviscerated in the woods with the dark entity nearby.  Taking the dog to the vet, they found it to have a spinal condition which prevented use of its rear legs, and had the animal euthanized.  Although the dog was eleven years old, Amy blamed herself for his death, or rather thought that the entity that latched onto her in the prison was responsible.  Three months transpired from the time of the prison visitation and subsequent nightmares until the dog’s demise.  The once skeptical husband had come to believe that something malevolent had attached itself to his wife, and followed her home from the prison.  The woman warned people to be careful if they went looking for something because they might find it, and it might not be what they had expected…  

Ernie the Elephant…

Posted November 27, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, furry, furry commercials, television

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One of the latest commercial pitch-beasts is Ernie the Elephant, voiced by John Cena.  Although a fish out of water or elephant away from the jungle, Ernie is strangely at home everywhere, and would be infinitely more affable as a symbol of the Republican Party than the sitting American president.  

Now Ernie prefers pistachios to peanuts, and touts them for the Wonderful Pistachio company at a variety of sites including a ball field (above) and even in an elevator where he’s set off a weight sensor alarm. Ernie regards pistachios as a healthy snack, which he relates to be important in a age of unrealistic body images; ain’t it the truth! Nothing says healthy snack more than an elephant with saggy gray skin and a ton of junk in the trunk, apparently.

Elephants in commercials are rare, with the icon for Elephant Insurance being the other exemplar who comes to mind.  Ernie is far more laid back, however, and if you have to have an elephant in the living room, I’d rather that it be this easy-going guy.  In my mad world I’d love to see a cross-over series with cgi animal characters such as Ernie, Chester Cheeto, and the milk-that-messes-with-you cow from the Lactaide commercials…now that’s entertainment!



“Terror in the Woods” Werewolf and Demon in the Woods

Posted November 23, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: controversial, creature features, cryptozoology, furry, strange happenings, television, unexplained

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Terror in the Woods does not refer to the state of the weeds and brush in my backyard, but is rather an entertaining if uneven offering on the Destination America channel network, your gateway to the paranormal!   While not the best paranormal show I’ve ever seen, Woods is certainly not the worst, and is probably worth a look if you’re into this kind of thing, especially in light of the dearth of new show material involving cryptids.

Now the Werewolf and Demon in the Woods episode (S1/Ep5) featured two segments, the first of which involved two campers, David and Lisa, who while traveling on Roanoke Island in North Carolina encountered a wolf-like creature with glowing yellow eyes that was about four feet tall and challenged the male of the pair who investigated sounds that he heard outside of his camper and the vehicle that he was pulling it with.  Things got freaky when the beast stood up upon two legs, which increased his standing height to about seven feet.  The wolf-thing then approached the guy, closing the distance while ambulating on two legs!  In the best Clint Eastwood tradition, the guy then pulled a magnum and fired a round at the creature, believing himself to have struck it in the shoulder.  This seemed to annoy rather than deter the beast.  When he perceived a second creature growling, the unhappy camper perceived himself to be outnumbered, wisely retreated to his vehicle, and beat a hasty retreat.  Later at a gas station, the motorist asked another person if he had ever seen something strange in the woods, and the reticent stranger admitted that he had.  This is the stuff of urban legends!

The second segment, Demon in the Woods, involved college-aged geo-cachers who carried their search for buried objects into the night where they found evidence of a satanic ritual in a clearing in the woods.  Discovered was a fenced-in circle with hanging objects around, similar to those portrayed in The Blait Witch Project.  The guys heard growling, grunting sounds which seemed to encircle them, and they took off running.  The tale-teller, Davey, went back for a straggler, and was again surrounded by a sound that seemed to pursue them as they fled.  Limbs and sticks were heard breaking as the duo fled.  While there was no physical presence seen, the sound seemed to be palpable, and shook them.  They felt that something was trying to drive them out of the woods.  It was later learned that a demonic cult held sessions in the area that they had visited… ooh!  (Face-palm scream)

So be careful when you go out in the woods, for “the nights are dark, and full of terrors.”  And that’s the way that I like it! 

 

Aspen Dental Well Commercial…

Posted November 8, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal presence, animals, furry, furry commercials, television

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If you’ve ever watched an episode of “Lassie,” this commercial may resonate with you, because it presents a variation on a classic scenario from the old television series where young Timmy falls into a well, and it’s up to the faithful collie Lassie to summon rescuers.  Timmy needed a dog to take care of him, ‘ya see…

The story elements are essentially there, with the alteration that two adults rather than Timmy are trapped in the well.  The canine on the surface is sent for help, but returns with…a dentist.  Although this is Aspen Dental’s heroic dentist, the misunderstanding well victims nonetheless tell the dog that she is bad before the intervening dentist drops a rope over the well’s edge, telling those captives that use of it will be a little like flossing.  They are in a cavity, after all…

That’s just a little dental humor coming from the man in the white clinical coat, who is equally adept at defeating bank robbers, rescuing folks from elevators, or starting cars stranded in the desert.  Perhaps in the future, the Aspen Dental guy will take on a personification of gum disease, tooth decay, or plaque.  He might even travel with a youthful sidekick called Oral Hygiene.  At any rate, it’s good to know that Lassie hasn’t been forgotten…and do watch out for abandoned wells out there!  

Halloween at Last!

Posted November 1, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: anthropomorphic, furry, seasonal, television

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To all my readers, a Happy HalloweenSamhain Greetings, Memorable All Souls Day, and Feliz Dia De Los Muertos!

Michael Jackson’s Halloween…

Posted October 28, 2017 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal elements, animal presence, anthropomorphic, furries, television

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This year brought the novelty of a new Halloween special in the form of Michael Jackson’s Halloween, a 3D animated hour-long special which aired on CBS October 27th, and featured the music of…Michael Jackson!  While centering on the efforts of two young people to rescue a dog and defeat an evil witch (Conformity) who wants to banish music and dancing, the high point of the hour to me occurred about seventeen minutes in when the two protagonists guided by a talking Bubbles the Chimp to “follow the music” entered a surreal pumpkin field where Hay Man, a groundskeeping scarecrow with a pumpkin for a head voiced by Jim Parsons (Sheldon from Big Bang Theory), was kind of channeling Michael Jackson in a Jack Skellington-esque way…

With an entourage of dancing pumpkins and forest and field animals (including some foxes), a rather funky rendition of Jackson’s Dangerous was performed, complete with Jackson’s trademark moves and even a pelvic thrust or two.  Also memorable was a later encounter with a mad scientist cat voiced by Dietrich Bader, Franklin Stein, creator of a machine to destroy music but really a frustrated musician himself whose technology becomes converted to summon Jackson.  And fear not, the evil witch (Lucy Liu) is defeated in a big dance finale by a stylized representation of 1980’s Michael Jackson himself in an outfit reminiscent of his Thriller attire.  Music and dancing are safe, so relax…

Jackson enjoyed both scary things and animals, and his presence looms large over this special, both in terms of the soundtrack and assorted images of the performer, seen even in the wallpaper pattern of the mysterious Jackson Street Palace Hotel where much of the action transpires.  As someone who appeared in quirky delights such as Disney’s Captain EO and Moonwalker, Michael probably would have liked this “magical adventure of personal discovery,” and we foxes do like to get our groove on!