Archive for the ‘things humans do’ category

Batmanning…

September 14, 2011

 – – People with entirely too much time on their hands have always found something to do, often by inventing fads or trends, for example cow-tipping or planking.  One of the latest ones is simply called Batmanning, and it basically involves hanging upside down by one’s feet from a door, bar, gate, ledge, or whatever.  It may be done by individuals alone, or in a group of any size as illustrated here. 

To hang like a bat requires a fair degree of athletic and acrobatic skill to say nothing of lower-body strength.  We do not recommend that you try this, or you may experience Emergency Rooming

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Exit the Tiger…

July 28, 2011

 – – I’ve seen far better tiger fursuits, but when Oregon democratic representative David Wu was photographed in a tiger suit, it raised concerns about erratic behavior and the congressman’s mental health!   The photo was apparently an attachment to an e-mail sent to a female staffer, and it apparently convinced a number of his staffers that Wu was batshit crazy, causing a number of them to resign and others to plan mental health interventions for him.  Wu said that the photo was taken while he was “joshing around” with his children late at night in October just before Halloween.

Sending the photo may have been poor judgement, but there are far worse photos that might be sent to female staffers, such as the shirtless and flexing  photos sent by one ousted New York congressman to a random woman met on Craigslist.  Later allegations of sexual improprieties would  force Wu to resign, but I will miss this nerdy congressman with limited social skills who in one speech famously said of the Bush administration, “Don’t let faux Klingons send real Americans to war!

Goldfish Racing…

April 24, 2011

 – – Not to be confused with cat juggling, dwarf bowling, or submarine races, goldfish racing is one of those strange pseudo-sports activities that bars seem to be host to, alcohol making such things just that much more amusing.

In goldfish racing, cheap “feeder”-type goldfish normally sold to be fed to other pets are guided and encouraged by bar patrons to swim down water troughs the length and general width of plastic gutters with bottles and water guns.  This practice has brought complaints from the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, who contend that the loud noises and bright lights used during the practice scare the bejesus out of the fish.  In addition, some fish have reportedly been impaled with soda straws or even swallowed alive by the same notorious bar patrons.

PETA’s protests have caused one Tacoma, Washington bar to cancel its weekly goldfish races, while other similar establishments are still having fish start their engines…

Horning In…

April 22, 2011

 – – On the outer fringes of the bodily modification culture are those such as the “Vampire Woman” pictured who has had titanium horns embedded in her skull.  The woman, Maria Jose Cristerna, is a 35-year-old former attorney turned tattoo artist who resides in Guadalajara, Mexico.  Cristerna believes humans have only one life and should live it the way they want; she chose to reinvent herself as a warrior following an abusive marriage, seeing the horns as a symbol of strength.

Elsewhere, Eril Sprague, also known as Lizardman, had horns implanted in his head as part of a body-based art project to explore the idea of what it means to be human.  Horn implants are characteristically done by body-modification artists rather than doctors, who are reluctant to implant in the forehead as objects put there are likely to erode through the skin and pose infection risks…

…But wouldn’t a horned attorney be really intimidating?!

Of Mice, Men, and Pizzas…

March 4, 2011

– – Some people bug their competition, while others inflict rodent infestations on them…or so it was in Upper Darby, Pennsylvania where a pizzeria owner with mice problems that he blamed on competitors tried to level the playing field by planting mice in two rival shops, presumably to drive them out of business.

Police authorities say that a man requested to use the bathroom in one pizzeria, taking the opportunity while in there to tuck a bag of three mice inside the drop ceiling.  He then walked across the street to another pizzeria, putting a bag of five live and one deceased mouse inside a trash can within that establishment!

The offending pizza-maker is facing charges of disorderly conduct, harassment, and animal cruelty, police said.  “We have never had anything like this where mice have been used as an instrument of crime,” said the police Superintendent.

The mice, evidently purchased the day of the crime at a nearby pet store, were turned over to animal control officers…

The Death of Bozo…

November 26, 2010

– – The bear, that is, not the clown!  Bozo the black bear had spent more than 15 years receiving treats near the grounds of a Northeastern Pennsylvania mountain resort, and was by all accounts a tame, gentle animal.  Unfortunately these very qualities probably led to his demise at the hands of a crossbow hunter on Nov. 15th, the first day of archery season.

One area resident fed Bozo for 17 years from the time that he was a cub, noting that the gentle giant was especially fond of donuts and anything sweet.  Bozo was considered a “mascot” at an area eatery, accepting ice cream there the night before he was slain.  He would sometimes let people pet him.  Local residents who had come to know and love Bozo are grief-stricken.  “I mean I feel like I lost a friend,” said one.

Ironically the hunter did nothing illegal, whereas those who fed him did. In Pennsylvania it’s illegal to feed some wildlife, including bears.–Why?–When a wild animal looses its fear of humans, it’s vulnerable.  Bears can create a public nuisance if they’re fed by humans, and they’re creatures of habit that can become accustomed to finding food in one area.

The legal slaying of a beloved and tame animal may create, however, a public relations disaster for the practice of hunting, which has already come under fire.  Hunting is further damaged by the attitudes of some of its practitioners.  One hunter said regarding Bozo’s death, “As long as the bear was not on someone’s property, it doesn’t matter if a few people liked it.”

Attitudes of that type and this image say more about hunting than any animal rights activist ever could.- -RIP, Bozo…



Real Piggy Banks…

November 14, 2010

– – How would you like a piggy bank made from a real piggy?–No, I wouldn’t, either…

They are for sale, however, from a novelty retailer out of Vancouver, British Columbia;  yes, taxidermied piglet piggy banks for a mere $4,000 each!  Production costs are high for the item, with the taxidermy process alone taking six months.  The piglets used have actually died of natural causes.

Animal activists have called the piglet banks, “a particularly callous and demeaning exploitation of a baby animal’s dead body.”  Although no pigs are killed to make the piglet banks, the co-owner of the Canadian novelty retail establishment which has been brought much publicity feels that the real argument would seem to be about taxidermy and whether preserving animals for aesthetic appeal is ethical.

There is unquestionably value in taxidermy to the extent that it has allowed for rare and extinct animals to be displayed and studied; I personally find the display of hacked-off animal parts to be gruesome and repugnant, however…