Archive for the ‘creature features’ category

Dragons vs. The Frozen Dead!

August 24, 2017

 

Noteworthy:  It was Dragons vs. Zombies  on a recent episode of the HBO series Game of Thrones.  Just when things were looking hopeless for virtuous character Jon Snow and his small band of seasoned fighters under siege by thousands of White Walkers (kind of like frozen dead), it was three great dragons to the rescue, spewing flames and causing the walking dead to combust merrily, a rout and a slaughter.  This is the kind of spectacle that makes for great television, about as good as it gets…

…but wait!  Things take a twist when the demonic leader of the White Walkers is able to peg a lance into one dragon, slaying it and later resurrecting it as a kind of zombie ice dragon ready to do his bidding.  The series finale of Game of Thrones should be truly epic…

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Original “Godzilla” Actor Dies…

August 8, 2017


He waded out of the Pacific Ocean in 1954, and into cinematic history.  He was one of the great ones, in every sense of the word.  And now it is with regret that I report that the original actor to play Godzilla has died of pneumonia at the age of 88…

Haruo Nakajima played Godzilla in twelve films, his last outing in 1972’s Godzilla vs. Gigan.  To prepare for the original role, Nakajima went to the Tokyo zoo to study the movements of elephants and bears, believing that Godzilla had to move convincingly to avoid being a farce.  The suit that he wore weighed up to 220 lbs. as it was crafted in part of ready-mixed concrete.  Stomping among miniaturized sets, Nakajima suffered for his art as wearing the suit caused him to sweat terribly.

Nakajima began his movie career in samurai and war movies before becoming a monster movie icon.  Not limited to one role, Nakajima also played Rodan, Mothra (my personal favorite), and King Kong! – – Thank you, Haruo, for bringing the King of the Monsters to life!  

“The Secret of the Little Girl” on “Mountain Monsters”

June 3, 2017

In the previous episode of “Mountain Monsters,” Jeff was seen wandering around three large grapevine rings in the Dark Forest while carrying a torch.  In S5/Ep7 it was learned that Jeff had met with the boss of the other team, and had been shown a ritual for the Three Rings constructions that was supposed to draw the “little girl” of great interest to that other team.  Buck in that meeting with Jeff shared his “lost time” in the woods when he ditched his cameraman and wandered about in a trance-like state following which time he was not immediately aware of what had happened.  A video was on Buck’s cell phone from that time which showed the enigmatic little girl, who it was deduced was the key to what the other team was looking for.  Jeff was sent back to tell the other team that he knew someone who had talked to the little girl.

This lure worked all too well, with the other team descending on the AIMS base camp with firearms, threatening to burn them out if they failed to surrender Buck, who had hidden in the woods near the base camp.  Managing to steal one of the other team’s trucks, he led them away in it, and hid until the next morning.  Meeting at that time with Huckleberry, Buck decided to go back north to the Three Rings area alone, with the rest of the team asked to create a diversion in the south to lure the other team away.  They did this by setting off trip wires of the other team, and dropped a tree across the road to slow that team’s exit, setting it afire for dramatic effect.

Arriving alone at the Three Rings constructions, Buck lit the torches that were there and walked through the Three Rings as described in the ritual to lure the little girl.  Reporting that it got colder after he did so, Buck remarked in hushed tones “She’s here,” and we were shown a fleeting, blurry monochrome image of the little girl at a distance as seen through one of the rings.  The season finale is coming soon, and hopefully too will be the end of this long, drawn-out saga that seems closer to The Blair Witch Project than cryptobiology…

Mountain Monsters: Secrets of the Dark Forest

April 26, 2017

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There’s a lot of repetition and drawing out of story lines in this bargain basement reality show, and if you were hoping to see “the Black Wolf” or “The Woman of the Woods” in this episode, you were likely to be disappointed…

Team researcher Jeff had been acting vaguely as if possessed recently, showing the others a video with a creepy voice recording, and relating how he had awoken in the Dark Forest alone with his clothes beside him.  The team in response followed GPS coordinates to the Dark Forest in Lee County, Virginia.  There they found Bigfoot signs such as broken branches, and ran across a reticent man they questioned who denied knowledge of anything but advised them not to go into the woods.  Of course they did (at night, no less), finding a deer head hung in the woods and perceiving something to run past them.  At that point, Jeff inexplicably got a nosebleed, and the evening’s festivities were called off.

Meanwhile, team members Willy and Wild Bill had been building a base camp shelter.  In the daytime, the team heard a high-pitched squeal, and pursuing it found what appeared to be wolf tracks by a river.  A tree-structure sign marker (pictured) was found near their camp, with Jeff later collapsing and being termed a security risk by team security member Huckleberry.  

Looking in the woods for additional marker-type signs, the team found sharpened branches and multiple trip lines.  Headlights were seen, causing the team to hunker down, at which point Jeff wigged out further, running off and leading them on a merry chase.  They found him in a trance-like state being pointed at by a small girl, who then conveniently ran off.  Jeff became combative when they tried to bring him around, but eventually came to himself.  Another strange noise was heard, and the team headed back to their base camp, finding someone sitting there who said that the noise they had heard was the Black Wolf.  The episode ended on this note, presumably with more to follow on the big bad wolf in the upcoming installment…

Carolina Reptile Man; Succubus; Napa Rebobs…

March 13, 2015

 

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The Carolina Reptile Man is a cold-blooded reptilian beast recently profiled on Monsters and Mysteries in America that supposedly preys upon unsuspecting campers along the South Carolina coast.  Legends of the creature go back hundreds of years to Native American accounts of “men with tails” in the Smoky Mountains, with more recent sightings dating to 2008 and twenty years before that…

…in 1988, an African American youth was reportedly attacked in his car by the reptilian, which perched on his roof and clawed at his windows.  Later, a crop duster about to take off had the creature appear in his flight path.  In August of 1990, a 19-year-old man was camping, and had his sleep interrupted by a yellow-eyed reptilian.  He repeatedly cracked his bull whip at it, but the spry creature snatched the whip from him, and bit the end off!  Beating a hasty retreat to put distance between himself and the Reptile Man, the subject was later picked up by a Native American, who told the camper that he was lucky he had only run into one of them (dramatic pause with music)!

Now we turn to the girl of your nightmares; the Succubus!  Reported in incidents from South Boston, Virginia, the succubus is a demonic female entity, a literally hot date with fiery eyes and heat to her skin who tries to collect male souls, stealing first breath and then life. Legends of the succubus extend back to stories of Lillith in the biblical Old Testament.  It’s in the nature of the succubus to first appear in dreams, then gradually gain physicality; to banish them, you need to drive them off by faith. 

A former prison counselor was profiled who had extensive dealings with sexual offenders, becoming tainted by them and getting into a darker lifestyle.  A succubus descended upon him one night, paralyzing him in bed until he drove it off by force of will.  A former heavy metal rock musician in 1990’s Springfield, Missouri who led a life of sex, drugs, and rock & roll reported visitations from a succubus who assaulted him.  Alluring at first, the succubus became a powerful, grotesque hag.  Able to finally drive the demon off, the rocker was thereafter compelled to live a more upright life.

Finally on Partrick Road in Napa Valley, California tales of Rebobs, flying monkeys, have lured thrill seekers for sixty years, with multiple sightings having occurred in the 1960’s and 1970’s.  In one incident, campers on Partrick Road heard screaming like a female voice.  Falling asleep, a male in the group later awoke to find large scratch marks across his torso.  Leaving, they later returned in their car, at which time something jumped in front of their vehicle and climbed a tree.  The creature was said to be larger than a man, to be dark and furry with wings, and to emit a terrifying screech.  Called “Rebobs,” these monkeys gone terribly wrong were said to be the creations of a mad scientist who made mutant simian creatures that eventually got loose, and made the area their home. 

A 1997 case cited involved a couple who went in search of the rebobs, going up Partrick Road and struck with a chilling cold.  They eventually found a gothic-looking, abandoned house where they heard and saw a red-eyed creature.  It fixed them with a penetrating stare, and gave them a feeling of lasting fear…

Snickers “Godzilla” Commercial…

July 16, 2014

 

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Godzilla, as we learn in a Snickers commercial, is an alright dude!  We are shown footage of the big guy in just slightly larger than human form, hanging at the beach, riding four wheelers, playing ping-pong, and making the scene at a party.- – What a party animal!

Godzilla’s actually pretty cool!,” comments one male party-goer to his friend.  “Except when he’s hungry,” corrects the buddy.  Then the footage cuts to Godzilla in full rampage, hundreds of feet tall and blasting cars airborne with his breath.  Fortunately, someone in the crowd knows the remedy for this situation, and lobs Godzilla a Snickers bar. – – He eats the morsel, gets a blissful expression on his massive face, and then suddenly…Party Godzilla is back, water skiing and blending happily into human society again!  

You’re not yourself when you’re hungry, we are told. Studies have shown that hunger and anger can be linked. Maybe then the answer to unrest in the Middle East and elsewhere is simply to bombard the combatants with Snickers bars…heck, diplomacy doesn’t seem to be doing much, so make chocolate, not war!

Godzilla Fiat Commercial…

June 3, 2014

Godzilla Fiat

“He’s back…and it looks like he’s craving Italian!” – –  Well, who could blame him, right?!

Movie tie-in commercials are usually terrible, but for this one, we’ll make an exception!  A city street is shown devastated, as if a war is going on…well, one is, but with the King of Monsters!  Godzilla, whose fortunes are on the rise with the new re-boot of his franchise, is clearly in control, buildings crumbling around him and hardly bothering with the pesky small-arms fire being directed against him ( foolish humans, when will they ever learn?).  Attacking a city does make a guy hungry, however, and the big guy is tossing small cars down his gullet.  Along then comes a bright yellow Fiat packed with people, and it too is thrown down Godzilla’s gargantuan hatch like a Cheeto…

…but wait!  Is it too much to swallow?!  The big guy vomits the Fiat back up, completely undamaged, and it hits the ground running flawlessly, spinning away. – –  Is it because Fiats taste terrible? – – No, it’s just because they’re surprisingly big, you see!  I guess that size does matter, after all…and next time, Godzilla, chew each bite before swallowing!