It Don’t Smell Like Roses!

 – – A Minnesota man recently deployed a fox product against pranksters who had been toilet papering his property; he hit them with fox urine!–Hey, we didn’t ask to be a biological weapon!

After discovering 15 to 20 people on his soybean field armed with, err, toilet paper, the property owner ordered the teenagers to leave, swore at them, and finally unleashed a Supersoaker squirt gun filled with fox urine upon the group!

…now fox urine has a rather distinctive and putrid smell, so much so that it is used to discourage rodents and other pests from trespassing.  It may therefore be judged equally unpleasant as an aftershave or body spray for young people.  The fox pee gunslinger now faces charges of fifth degree assault and disorderly conduct related to the incident.

Fox urine, by the way, is also a good repellent for rabbits, skunks, squirrels, possums, and woodchucks, and is also available as a less messy shake away powder which works longer, smells stronger, and won’t evaporate, freeze, or soak into the ground the way regular fox urine does…better living through chemistry, right?


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4 Comments on “It Don’t Smell Like Roses!”

  1. carycomic Says:

    It figures. He defends his property with non-lethal force. And, the ones who were trespassing with intent to commit malicious mischief don’t get _anything_ done to them by the courts!

    It’s no wonder paramilitary vigilantism seems to be increasing in popularity with Midwesterners.

  2. carycomic Says:

    Postscript for the political correctness addicts: you will note I said “seems!”


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