Don’t Tase the Bruins, Bro!

– – Humans who seek to neutralize bears with a stun gun may wish to consider that it doesn’t work terribly well on them, and may leave them seriously annoyed, possibly resulted in you being mauled and eaten!

This is what happened in Anchorage, Alaska on July 22nd after a man caught a bear by his fish fryer and proceeded to shoot it with a stun gun; the bear “went inverted, with feet in the air, growling and crying at the same time, flailing with his feet.  He actually rolled off the porch.”

Now while the gentleman in question escaped being mauled and eaten, Fish and Game officials in Alaska warn that after the initial shock, the bear might go into a rage and ruin your whole day.  Even Sarah Palin understands this, which is why bear hunters carry a .45 pistol on their belt when they go hunting to back up their shotgun.  Using a stun gun on a bear is like using a peashooter on a bomber.

So don’t tase bears, which outweigh you by 800 pounds and are pointy on five of their six ends.  Should you, however, run across a picnic-basket stealing bear named Yogi, use whatever weapon you may have at hand…

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4 Comments on “Don’t Tase the Bruins, Bro!”

  1. carycomic Says:

    “I resemble that remark, Mr. Ranger Sir. Nya-hey-hey-HEE!”

  2. carycomic Says:

    His cousin Smokey once caught him frying some stolen chicken over an improperly-tended barbecue pit. Smokey promptly extinguished the flames. To which Yogi exclaimed:

    “Only YOU could prevent forest fryers!”


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